


A Normal Halloween

by sharedwithyou



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst and Humor, Dean is a Little Shit, Depressing, F/F, F/M, Heavy Angst, High School Student Dean, High School Student Sam, Random Lesbian Moment, Reunions, Sam is a Sweetheart, Sam is also sometimes a Little Shit, Very depressing, angst angst angst, high school sucks, mostly angst, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-01
Updated: 2016-11-01
Packaged: 2018-08-28 10:43:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8442766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharedwithyou/pseuds/sharedwithyou
Summary: the title is lame. read it anyoneWarning: very depressing. not violent/traumatic. Just. like, sad. “Hey, (y/n), maybe for Halloween you can be ‘normal.’ That would really surprise everyone.”You shaded your face with your hair as you turned away. Sticks and stones may break my bones:But let’s pretend words aren’t devastating if you don’t acknowledge them.“Or just be yourself. It would still freak everyone out.”“Leave her alone, Dean.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> this is sad. it is not happy. it is sad.
> 
> warning: very depressing. No violence, no post/past trauma/psychological triggers like some of my angst fics. but this is sad and there's no happy ending so yeah
> 
> but it's still good shit i'd say
> 
> soooo leave a comment!
> 
> XOXO Bucky the Angstmaster

 

“Hey, (y/n), maybe for Halloween you can be ‘normal.’ That would really surprise everyone.”

You shaded your face with your hair as you turned away. Sticks and stones may break my bones:

But let’s pretend words aren’t devastating if you don’t acknowledge them.

“Or just be yourself. It would still freak everyone out.”

“Leave her alone, Dean.”

The short, sweet boy couldn’t possibly be related to that asshole, but he was. And it worked. Dean let out another hateful laugh, but walked off to a bunch of girls who squealed his name. Groupies.

“Sorry about that. He’s just in a bad mood since my dad’s been gone for so long.”

You shrugged. Everyone knows school is where you air out your dirty laundry from home.

“He’s really not such a bad guy, once you get to know him.”

There’s not much getting to know someone who’s constantly making fun of you, is there? Well, he was nice to his own brother, anyway. You supposed that would make him only a mild sociopath.

“If you stick up for yourself he’ll leave you alone. He’s all talk. And kind of an attention whore.”

Your eyes widened and the corners of your lips twitched; Sam almost never swore, and he would never call a girl something that derogatory. He blushed at your gaze; it was cute.

“Sorry. His words, not mine.”

“If he’s a douche, he might as well be a self-aware one.” Sam gave you a conflicted smile. He didn’t like when anyone talked shit about his brother besides himself; but he was proud he’d finally gotten you to speak. He expected your voice to be soft, maybe squeaky, but it wasn’t. It was just a regular voice. Normal.

“Right…well I better get to class.” He picked up his backpack and gave you a small wave, before slinging it over his shoulder and walking off to find some friends.

You didn’t really count as a friend you guessed. At best, a work-in-progress; more likely, a charity case.

Someday you’d find the energy to “stick up for yourself.” But life was tiring, family was tiring, people were tiring.

If people were going to be jerks anyway, verbal rebuttal of it was neither here nor there. You couldn’t foresee the satisfaction of an eye for an eye. And life had taught you there was no such thing as justice.

 

 

“Hey (y/n), there’s three more days til Halloween. You can wash your hair today and still be a greasy ghoul this weekend.”

You walked past him, holding your scoff in until he was out of earshot. The heat had gone out at your place, and pneumonia trumped personal hygiene. A neighbor had offered to let you shower at their place but you didn’t like the idea of being naked in another person’s house, so you declined politely. You didn’t think your hair looked that bad. Maybe you’d borrow Becky’s dry shampoo during morning break. Not that you cared what he thought, and not that it mattered.

He could just find something else to pick on.

“Aww, what did he say this time?”

You nearly bumped into Sam around the corner and apparently your face wasn’t all that chipper.

“Meh, just that my hair was greasy.”

“Naw, it looks fine.” He gave you a grin and you almost smiled back. “It looks normal.”

Right, like that was what you were shooting for. To be another sheep in the herd of self-preservation and loneliness. Fitting in only to survive. You’d rather be the black sheep.

The black, greasy sheep.

Still, it was the thought that counted. “Thanks, Sam.”

“Anytime.” He assured you. “Hey, you want to hang out with us at lunch today?”

Us? You didn’t notice that two other boys had joined you in your once-solitary walk to homeroom.

You tilted your head, so he turned to his friends. “Okay with you guys?”

“Sure,” one mumbled, clearly not that thrilled. The other nodded, a more positive reaction. Maybe because you had been his lab partner last semester. So, mixed bag.

“Maybe some other time,” you answered, remembering you had another college prep assignment you wanted to finish by tonight.

“Okay.” He looked slightly disappointed, and it probably would’ve been an opportunity to give him a hug that the other girls were always “dying” to do. You didn’t really understand that; if they wanted to do it, why didn’t they just do it? No need to fantasize if it was easily attainable. Just like you’d talk back to Dean if you really wanted to.

“See you around, then.”

“We’re in the same math class, Sam.”

“Oh yeah.” You sat in the opposite back corner and never raised your hand, so you were easily forgotten. Convenient when you were doing other assignments instead of “following along” with the lesson. Getting ahead would mean getting out of there. Hopefully. “Well, see you in class then.”

“Bye.” You nodded at the other two boys, who mumbled back at you.

Then you swept off with your greasy hair so they could non-whisper behind you.

“Dude, why do you hang out with her? She’s weird.”

“No she’s not. She’s normal; you’ll see.”

 

 

“Welcome to Mel’s, how can I help you?”

“I swear we’ve met before.”

You smiled wryly; you’d heard that line before. This guy meant it, though. And if you weren’t mistaken, it was Dean freaking Winchester. Back to this little town years after he’d left abruptly two months before graduation.

“I don’t think so. It’s a small town; I’d remember you.” You played along, wondering how long it would take to catch on.

“Is that so?” He wiggled his eyebrows as you led him to a booth by the window. A face like his could definitely up the foot traffic in your diner.

“Mhm.” You placed two menus on the table, before picking one up again. “Just you?”

“Oh, uh, no. My brother’s coming.” Figures. Still, it would be nice to see Sam again. Though he’d probably recognize you and end the little game you were playing. Bummer.

“So what brings you to NoWheresVille?”

“Nothing like the backwoods for Halloween, right?” He quipped.

“Yeah, our bumpkin cornfield would probably scare you city boys more than the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland.”

“Hey, I got a little country in me.” You weren’t sure if seven months at the local high school counted, but maybe he’d gotten some back-asswards schooling somewhere else. Still, he stuck out like a sore thumb. Never could shake the spotlight, Dean.

 

 

“Kegger at our place tonight,” Dean the King shouted across the quad and a hundred lemming cheers erupted as you tried to eat your sandwich in peace.

“Don’t you live in a one-bedroom apartment?” You asked Sam, who had opted to leave his friends behind and sit with you today.

“Yeah, but Dean will find a way to shove everyone in.”

“Dad still out of town?”

He nodded sadly, so you offered him a homemade chocolate chip cookie from the batch you’d made last night. Finals were coming up, and you stress-baked.

“Wow, these are really good!”

“Thanks.”

“No, I mean REALLY good.” He wolfed it down so fast you barely had time to hand him another. “You should start a bakery or something!”

“You must be really hungry or something.”

“Gosh (y/n), you should learn how to take a compliment.”

Whatever you were going to say next left your mind instantly when Dean strolled by casually, extra-cool.

“Hey (y/n), I’m in such a good mood I’m even gonna invite you to our place tonight.”

“Yippee.”

He raised his brows but continued his wicked smirk. “Sam, would you look at that?! She talks!”

“Shove off, Dean.”

“What, I’m just inviting your girlfriend over. Unless you’re going to her place.”

“She’s not my girlfriend!!”

You felt like shrinking back from your so-called boyfriend since he sounded so insulted, but as usual you showed no emotion. “I’ll be there, Dean.”

“Cool.” Dean answered automatically, now focused on his little bro. It was almost cute that he actually felt bad for teasing him. “Let’s go home Sammy. We gotta get the place ready.”

“I have sixth period science-“

“Hey, you can learn when you’re dead.” And with that, he walked off, and his little brother trailed off behind him without so much as a goodbye.

 

Welp, now you had to get a costume.

 

 

“Wow, you ate that burger fast.”

You had traded places with the chef for a bit, and when you came back, Dean’s plate was clean.

“It was dope. Give the chef my compliments.”

“Dope? You definitely don’t belong here.”

“I go where I please.” His blue eyes glittered, the way they did when all those girls swooned. You gave him a toothy smile in return.

“Well I hope you saved some room for dessert.”

“Whachu got in mind?”

“Well we’re famous for our chocolate chip cookies.”

“Cookies? Really? I’m more of a pie guy.”

“First one’s on the house then; but I guarantee you’ll want the whole dozen.”

Sam, who hadn’t shown up yet both to your delight and chagrin, had been right about one thing. Your cookies were really, really good.

 

 

“Pot cookies? You’re the best, man.”

“Dude, I have major munchies. You’re awesome, (y/n).”

These were the “normal” ones? You had shown up to the apartment with a tray of cookies, since the only parties you’d been to were potlucks, and they were gone within two minutes. You wished you had a book to read. This stupid “vampire” costume your neighbor’s daughter lent you was 30% fabric and 70% leg, and the guys’ leers were getting uncomfortable.

“Who made these cookies??” The gyrating crowd managed to make way for Dean to stumble through. He was, as they say, “shit-faced.”

Someone pointed at you, and he raised his brows at you for the second time today. Or ever. “Well, you’re just full of surprises aren’t you?”

“Thanks for the invitation.” Your voice was flat, but he missed it completely.

“Mi casa es su casa. So, you here for little bro?”

“..yes. My ‘boyfriend.’” The sarcasm was dripping from the last word but it went way over his head.

“Sammy!! Your girl is here!!” He shouted, and a grouchy-looking Sam popped his head out from over the banister ahead.

“Oh, hey (y/n).” He looked embarrassed. You weren’t sure if it was from his perceived revulsion earlier or the supposed connection that still remained.

“Hi.” You kept your face neutral.

“Sorry, uh, I have a lot of homework.”

“Come on, Sammy, don’t be such a nerd!!” Dean egged on, oblivious.

“I could help,” you offered, ready to gauge his response.

“Nah... I, ahem, I got it.” Ouch. Well, might as well get some free food while you were here.

“Ok.”

“What, you got another girl in their Sam? A ladies man, just like his big bro!” Dean crowed, and Sam shut his door firmly, effectively ending the conversation. Dean turned to you with a look of sympathy. “Well, there are plenty of other fish in the sea, right?”

“Sure. So, point me to the kitchen?”

“Follow me.” He swayed to the left, watching people move in and out of the way as you tried to catch up with him. When you got stuck behind two couples making out, he reached through them and grabbed your hand to pull you through. You cursed yourself inwardly at how nice his callouses felt against your skin. So this is how the ladies man worked. That is, he didn’t. It just came naturally.

Bastard.

“So we got chips and dip, beer, and uh some casserole that Donnie’s mom made. I think it has okra in it though, since it’s relatively untouched.”

You shrugged and grabbed a plate, digging in. When you looked back, he was still there, leaning against the fridge behind three girls doing jello shots. They were in booty shorts, but he was still staring at you.

His eyes were gorgeous.

“What?”

“I just can’t believe you’re actually eating that.”

“I’m starving. All I had to eat were two cookies.”

“Man, those cookies were good.” He gave you a goofy drunk grin and you felt your lips stretch back, hating it.

“Hey, Dean, watch this!” A girl, Becky’s friend April you think, staggered in. “This is what you like, isn’t it!” Without hesitation, she grabbed one of the jello girls and began kissing her deeply. Dean looked both turned on and uncomfortable. Interesting.

“April-“

“You like making out with other girls, huh?! You like it when I do it too?!”

You didn’t understand the logic, but Dean was half-staring, half-looking away.

“I’m, uh, going to get some air.” Not wanting to get caught in the fall-out, you grabbed the casserole dish and your fork, and made a beeline for the back door.

“Oh, me too.” Crap, should’ve realized he’d make the same move. Well, hopefully he didn’t want any casserole.

 

 

“Here, these will knock your socks off.”

You handed him a warm plate of cookies and he took a bite at the same time the bell hanging on the front door chimed and a giant walked in.

“Oh my God, (y/n)!”

 

 

“So…” Dean nursed a beer and you looked up from the glass dish with a scowl. He’d been mumbling to himself for a while and it was annoying. “Are you sober?”

“Yes.”

“…I’m just not used to you…talking.”

“I don’t like to waste my breath.” You shoveled another mouthful and hope he’d get the message. Which of course, he didn’t.

“Ya know, if you’d talked to me sooner, I wouldn’t have kept calling you out.”

“Good to know.”

“You were so quiet, I figured it was because you had the voice of a toad or something.”

You didn’t bother replying.

“But you sound…”

“Normal?” You said the word without the loathing you felt.

“I guess.” He drained the can and crushed it, before sizing you up. You placed the dish on your knees so he couldn’t see your legs. “And the way you’re dressed tonight, too.”

Yes, you fit right in with the rest of the naughty nurses and slutty ladybugs. “Normal.” This time you let a little disdain seep into the word.

“Nah. I was gonna say good.”

“Well, thanks.” You wondered if sarcasm worked on the drunk. You wanted him to know just how little you thought of his approval.

“Normal’s overrated, anyway.” Maybe he just liked the sound of his own voice, because he barreled on.

“I concur.” You answered, slightly surprised.

“Huh?”

“Ditto.”

“Right.” He gave you another grin. “You’re a smart one, aren’t you?”

“Define smart.”

“You aren’t like the other girls. You make a guy work for it.” Well, douche of the month right there.

You got up to go: you were nice and full. Of food and dickishness.

“Wait, that came out wrong.”

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

He pulled himself to his feet and tripped after you as you made your way around to the front of the building where you’d parked your bike.

“Gimme a chance, (y/n).”

“For what?”

“To apologize.” He leaned over and almost puked; you weren’t sure if it was the liquor or the idea of being wrong that was making him gag.

“I gotta go.”

“I knew my smooth guy persona wouldn’t work on you, you know?”

You gave him a look as you unchained your bike. How could this bum be related to Sam?

Then again Sam wasn’t exactly Mr. Gentleman right now. He’d snubbed you earlier; and now you saw him staring at the two of you from the upstairs window.

“So you thought I’d fall for you if you were an ass?”

He nodded sheepishly, not having hurled yet, and you almost fell for it. You got off your bike and helped him up from where he’d been wretching and heaving.

“At least let me drive you home.”

“You don’t have a license. And you’re drunk.”

“It’s late. It isn’t safe.” He persisted and you gave him a beam that would’ve knocked his eyebrows off if he wasn’t so focused on making a concerned face.

“That’s sweet, Dean.”

And you leaned in to kiss him.

Or at least to whisper in his ear. “You know, the being a piece of shit to hide that you’re actually a ‘nice guy’ persona doesn’t work on me either.”

You enjoyed the look of shock on his face as you kicked off the bike stand, waved to Sam who’d ducked behind a curtain, and rode off.

 

Dean left you alone the rest of his time in NoWheresVille.

 

 

“Wow, (y/n), you look great!” Sam, who’d grown at least three feet, walked over and gave you a big hug. “I was hoping to run into you here. Though I figured you’d be off at some huge university getting your eight degree.”

“Nah, I picked up for Mel after she got sick. Redid the menu and everything.” You got him a glass of milk as Dean coughed and hacked, having choked on his cookie.

“I’m happy for you!” Sam chirped. “Sorry we lost touch after we left.”

You remembered Sam giving you a long hug and promising he’d write the day Papa Winchester pulled up to school. You’d given him a fake smile; he didn’t even have your address. You gave him the same smile now.

“No biggie. Here let me get you some cookies.”

“Dean, you remember (y/n) right?” You heard the edge in Sam’s voice as they mumbled back and forth while you went to the bakery case. It was almost hilarious how Dean only recognized you when he had a bite of your cookies.

“Yes Sam, I remember her.” He answered loudly when you came back with another plate.

“So what brings you boys to town so close to Halloween?” You wanted to see how they’d answer now that they were a united front.

“Oh, just gonna run through the cornfields. So we city boys can get our spook on.” Dean answered before Sam could say anything. His voice was considerably colder now, to your satisfaction. How embarrassing for him that he didn’t recognize you. And that you’d avoided being played by him twice now.

“Just passing through,” Sam piped up quickly, before letting out a happy sigh after his first bite of your infamous cookies. “Wow, just as good as I remembered.”

 

“Thanks.” You left the bitterness out of it this time.

 

 

“It’s too bad I missed out on your cookies last night.”

You looked up from your book as Sam slid onto the bench next to you.

“Yeah they were snatched up pretty quickly.”

You didn’t bother acting cold with him; he wasn’t obligated to be your friend. And now that Dean avoided eye contact when he walked past you, Sam didn’t have to stick up for you anymore.

“So last night was pretty crazy, huh?”

Considering he’d been in his room the entire time, you didn’t think he was the most accurate judge. But you let it slide.

“Sure.”

“So, uhm, my brother-“

“I don’t think he’ll be bothering me anymore.”

“Oh.” He looked confused but relieved. “Good.”

You smiled slightly and went back to your book. You finished three pages before he spoke again.

“See, I knew he’d get better once you talked to him.”

You wondered if Dean would ever tell his little bro what had happened. Probably never.

“Thanks. Now everything’s normal.” He couldn’t know how empty you felt when you said that.

“Yup. Normal’s great.”

 

And so the two of you continued your half-acquaintanceship of normalcy until he left with his brother.

 

 

“Well, we better get going.” Dean was tapping his foot restlessly while his brother chomped on the cookies obliviously. Son of a bitch probably wasn’t even going to tip.

“Come on Sammy, we’ve got work to do.”

“Huh? Oh, right.” What kind of work do you do when ‘passing through,’ really? But you’d never bothered to acknowledge shit and you wouldn’t now. Well, save for the big things.

“You guys watch yourselves out there now.”

“Why?” Dean narrowed his eyes at you while Sam gulped down the rest of his milk.

“You know, people talk. No one knows what exactly; but something strange is going on around here.”

Dean looked like he wanted to press you for more, but Sam was tugging him towards the door. He’d left a ten by his plate just for the cookies. He’d always been the sweeter one.

“Well, if you hear anything, let us know.” Dean handed you a card before he walked out with the swagger he’d had years ago.

You probably wouldn’t call; and they probably knew more about the weird killings around town than you did anyway.

 

Still, you couldn’t help calling over their shoulders.

 

“Looks like things aren’t so normal anymore, are they?”

**Author's Note:**

> I KNOW THIS WAS SAD
> 
> leave me a comment anyway!!
> 
> random ramblings:
> 
> shout-out to my girl harley who stress-bakes. which i could have some of your treats lovely!
> 
> quick poll 1: SADDEST MOMENT/LINE
> 
> FYI i LOVE halloween and usually have a really good one. This year's was good too, but i was writing and this is what came out, so yeah. but i love halloween. i also wear costumes on normal tuesdays. its just how i roll.
> 
> i made dean a really big dick in this one. oops.
> 
> saddest part for me is i think when sam says he'll write and lovely is like wtf you don't have my address don't pretend to be nice but she just fake smiles and says okay  
> ugh. my heart.
> 
> also high school sucked but it did have some good moments. i'm glad it's over but i'm also glad i went through it. usually when i write about high school in fics it's pretty negative, but there are definitely some good times. just in case you're in high school right now and you hate it, though, it does get better. life after high school was way more awesome
> 
> quick poll 2: if i make a sequel~ whoo??!!!! and maybe what??
> 
> I FEEL BAD leaving this fic like this. depressing. just depressing. so i'll probably make a sequel. so it can have a less open-ended ending. and there can be like at least one happy moment. and maybe some kind of hunt or something.  
> i'm leaning towards Dean. Because i feel like he has so much more to make up for. also it would make for more angst.  
> also sammy kind of had feelings for lovely (in case you didn't get that feel, well now you know) in the past and i think he kind of screwed it up. but oh well.
> 
>  
> 
> quick poll 3: what did you do for halloween?! unless you don't celebrate it  
> i sewed a costume throughout october, took a bunch of pictures and then sat down and killed monsters with hubz all night (aka video games. which i love just as much/more than going out)
> 
> that's all this time lovelies!! sorry for the sadness!! see you soon!!
> 
>  
> 
> XOXO Bucky


End file.
